part one

I told the boy that when I want to write, it is a feeling in my throat. A physical push forward. I am a girl, but I can think of it like a metaphorical erection, the semen coming out of my mouth. It is not something I want to do, sometimes, and sometimes it is.… Continue reading part one

poem: us and them

they met on a trainand then did not meetfor manyyears.the girl said, stories must be,by definition, sad and therefore i do notwant a storywith you. the boy said, we have nochoice we are humanand thus doomedto suffer.

poem: heavenly bastard in the sky

he said somedayyou will see yourself on the otherside of the mountains, your facein the trumpets of the yellowsea. mongolian ash-trays cannotsee you; they see shadows, breastsand hands where girls blinkand shit; he wascurled in a chair, his parts decriminalized into yarn, readinga white book. the trumpets go andgo. she said somedayyou will see yourself… Continue reading poem: heavenly bastard in the sky

poem: instagram

silent ownership in the night, youonly exist like a characterinside my mind-fuckingmental state. i want to make it keep it pretty, i cannot / but whenit happens, it issoft little waves rushingup on me. the daylight is veryawkward, we are realpeople. the refrigerator is silent,mad old greek godor silicone statue, thinkingi took your motherfaster, manage… Continue reading poem: instagram

poem: save ur tears

set the scene: girl, realizingquickly inside the lights that the boywill not tellher everything. how can i say —without mocking — that youthat you exist within smallsnake lines; train stationin august alsoseptember; the lines lookdifferent inside rain lightsstation lights, people with ezra pound faces, petals and bulbouseyes. the girl realizingthe boy is leaving, he is… Continue reading poem: save ur tears

poem: that man

winter is invariably winter; people are different people when they wake up in the morning. he stayed lateinside the night 90s computer eyes, 90s animeboy. blink twice it's probablythe matrix; summer is invariablysummer he will walk awaythrough the heat, but nowhe stayed late on the couch lateinto the morning. white snow morningspuffy thin air, animeeyes.… Continue reading poem: that man

poem: anime & broken hearts watchlist

i watched Death Note, Welcome to the NHK, the first season of Psycho-Pass — I had neverwatched anime before, i was alreadyunpopular in highschool and did not wantto be that girl. i watched A SilentVoice in my pink summer sheets and i cried, i later watched Himizu and alsocried. i did not finishPerfect Blue, i… Continue reading poem: anime & broken hearts watchlist

writing: literary suicide note

There was no newness to anything anymore. She sat in the house and waited for people to be finished; she sat on the couches and watched the clouds pass over the fields outside the windows; the windows were perpetually dirty, smudged sometimes when the cats shoved their homesick faces against the glass and mostly smudged… Continue reading writing: literary suicide note

poem: corazon

nothing boys, whose head is somethingi am not and cannot be, i don't know whatand how. you are thinking, your handsyour wide beautiful shoulderswide eyes. i am lonelierwith your existence than if your existence was not; you are not like me, there is no danger of your leaving planets. the mythology it stays long after… Continue reading poem: corazon

poem: ‘now’

when i was young, i overanalysed, gave moments great epochs: that fall that summer, the size and emotionof the wind, the tree-shadow on the gable and kawaii music orold literature and cats. the boys all becomingsoulmates, over-explained but neverread. the people now are like the year: twenty-twenty, riots riots riots. she stilldoesn't know if this… Continue reading poem: ‘now’